Club rules

How we treat each other

A short set of expectations every member agrees to. They exist to keep Vellum calm, safe, and worth returning to. Breaking them can mean a warning, a pause, or removal.

01

Be real

Use your real identity and true details, including relationship status. Verification keeps the club honest.

02

Respect consent

A private chat opens only when someone accepts. If they don't, let it rest — no repeated requests, no pressure.

03

Keep it kind

No harassment, hate, or unsafe behavior. Speak to people the way you would at a good dinner table.

04

Protect privacy

Don't screenshot, share, or expose other members or their messages outside Vellum. What happens in a Circle stays private.

05

Show up

Reserve a Circle seat only if you intend to attend. A seat hold protects the table; repeated no-shows affect access.

06

No selling, no spam

Rooms and Circles are for conversation, not promotion, recruiting, or bulk messaging.

When rules are broken

Members can report harassment, inappropriate messages, unsafe behavior, fake identity, privacy concerns, no-shows, and spam. A Vellum admin reviews every report. Depending on severity, we may warn, delete a message, freeze a Circle Room, pause, suspend, or remove a member, and block an introduction.

On married members

Married members cannot join romantic or romantic-adjacent Circles. Relationship status must be truthful, and admins may restrict access to certain Rooms and Circles based on status and eligibility.

Some friction is intentional. It’s what keeps the club a place worth being in.